


Falling

by Tetraktys



Category: Eldarya (Video Game)
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, F/M, Follows episode 26, Kissing, Love, Making Love, Masturbation, Passion, Post-Canon, Sex, Voyeurism, Water Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-18
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-06-30 11:04:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19851829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tetraktys/pseuds/Tetraktys
Summary: This follows the evolution of Erika and Lance's relationship following the events of episode 26.Most chapters are inspired by prompt requests I received on tumblr.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> 62\. “I think that’s the first time I’ve heard you moan…it was like a fucking melody.” & 63\. “I really want to kiss you right now.” “Then do it.” & 84\. “I’m gonna strangle you.” “Is that a promise?”

“Erika!” Miiko threw her arms around me, hugging me like she’d never done before. I knew her feelings towards me had changed in time, but I had no idea of the extent of her affection.

Before I could even say a word, someone else was waiting to greet me, and Huang Hua held me in an even tighter grip. I felt tears coming to my eyes, I’d lost my family, but I wasn’t unloved.

“Tell us everything,” she said once we got to the Christal room. A foreign feeling crossed my body, I couldn’t perceive the Oracle’s presence anymore… she was really gone.

“I know,” Miiko nodded catching my gaze, “I feel the same.”

“What’s going to happen now?” I asked tiredly to both of them. The Oracle is dead, we are still surrounded by traitors and Valkyon is gone, taken by Lance who knows where.” I went to lean against the wall, exhausted. “Once the guys managed to rescue me from certain death at the bottom of Memoria’s cliff they had already disappeared.”

“Certain death?” Huan Hua repeated, her eyes bulging in shock, “tell us everything, from the moment that monster kidnapped you.”

I opened my mouth and tried to formulate the words, but a sharp pain in my chest stopped me from even emitting a sound.

I’d realised, the moment we’d got to the sea traveling back to HQ, that Lance had done something to me. The guys had asked me all kinds of questions about what had happened, but I hadn’t been able to reply to even one. He must have used the same spell that tied him to the daemon and prevented from tell each other’s secrets. Had it worked on me because I was part aengel?

Miiko and Huan Hua were disappointed but allowed me to go back to my room and rest, I really was exhausted.

I let my tired body fell onto my bed. Ugh… I was still wearing my dusty, worn clothes… without even getting up, I undressed and threw them to the floor, remaining just in my underwear. I didn’t have the strength to shower, I was going to do it in the morning.

I’d left my door unlocked just in case, but I knew my boyfriend wasn’t going to join me that night. There were too many things to discuss and plans to make to go to Valkyon’s rescue.

But did he really need saving? I thought as I tossed and turned in my bed. Lance wasn’t going to hurt him, I was sure about that now. Whatever his sins, and there were many, he wasn’t going to turn against his family. After the things we’d seen in Memoria, his people, his mother… I’d never seen him as shaken and shattered as when he’d witnessed his parents’ final hours.

I knew it now, his heart was in pieces.

Would a completely evil man be capable of feeling so much? With such intensity?

I didn’t think so, still… he’d thrown me off that cliff just to buy himself time to escape. I liked to think that he’d done so because he was sure the guys were there ready to save me, but I felt disappointed, and I had no reason to.

 _That’s not true, is it?_ Said a little voice inside my head, _you two were getting pretty friendly on that island._

I swallowed hard, a little ashamed of myself. There’d been moments, during this whole kidnapping ordeal, that he hadn’t treated me just as his prisoner.

There’d been moments where I hadn’t seen him as a monster.

There’d been moments where I’d been incredibly attracted to him, where I’d forgotten about anything and _anyone_ else.

I was suddenly feeling hot, even though I was almost completely naked. Touching the skin on my chest, I realised I was burning up, and I was pretty sure I wasn’t ill.

My hand moved to my belly, caressing lightly… and in my mind it wasn’t my hand at all… it was bigger, stronger… wearing a tick, black, leather glove.

“What do you want, little thing…” his voice whispered to my ear, as if he were there with me.

“I really want to kiss you right now,” I replied, my hand… _his hand_ … moving to my hips, each caress leaving goosebumps on my skin.

“Then do it,” he taunted me and, with my eyes closed, I could see his devilish smirk.

The hand was now between my legs, above my underwear, touching between my fold, the thin barrier of my slip doing nothing to prevent me from feeling everything.

And because in fantasies there are no consequences and prices to pay, I kissed him.

My lips attacked that evil smirk with hunger, meanwhile the fingers between my legs had found exactly the right spot where they were needed the most and started massaging with vigour and expertise.

I didn’t want sweet, I didn’t need soft, in my mind our kiss was pure instinct and untamed power. I stayed there, writhing on my bed, enjoying that forbidden fantasy for I didn’t know how long.

With one final bite to his lips I came, my back arching and my body shaking uncontrollably.

“I think that’s the first time I heard you moan, it was a fucking melody.”

This time the voice, _his voice_ , wasn’t coming from my head. I immediately opened my eyes and raised my back to rest on my elbows, my skin flushed and my muscles weak, while I was still partially coming down from the pleasure I’d just experienced.

Lance was right there, leaning against the wall in the darkest corner of my room, and was looking at me with hunger in his eyes, his gaze caressing my whole body from head to toe.

“How…” I started to ask, when he interrupted me.

“That was the best show I’ve ever seen in my life, I should thank you.”

“It wasn’t a show, and it definitely wasn’t for you,” I replied angrily.

“Really?” he said coming closer, with confident steps. Crunching down he grabbed my chin between his fingers and added “and I was so sure it was my name I’d heard on those sweet lips of yours when you came.”

I hadn’t… had I?

“I‘m going to strangle you,” I growled between my teeth, murder in my eyes.

“Is that a promise?” he replied, his evil smirk back in place.

“While there’s nothing I would love more right now than having your hands all over me, I can hear someone coming, they’ll be here soon.”

Standing up he went to my window.

“I stopped by to say that I’m back and I will need your cooperation in some matters.”

“The hell I’m going to help you, it’s enough that I can’t say anything about you,” I replied standing up and grabbing a night-gown, finally aware that I was almost naked in front of him.

“And isn’t that convenient?” he replied climbing my windowsill, “this way you don’t have to pretend to get into any moral battle with your conscience. You’re welcome.”

“You’re impossible!” I whispered-yelled, “where’s Valkyon?”

“I doesn’t concern you, just know that he’s fine and he’s exactly where’s supposed to be, at my side. I’ll see you soon.”

He jumped off, right before a knock came to my door. Karen had been sent to wake me up to discuss about possible plans to find Lance.

Little did they know he was right there under their noses.

And I wasn’t going to tell them.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 19\. “Take off your clothes.” & 22\. “Mine.” & 61\. “You better shut that pretty little mouth before i put it to work, doll.”  
> 36\. “Could he make you feel as good as i do?” & 60\. “I’m gonna fuck you so hard that you forget you ever even met that asshole.”

I walked down the cobbled steps of the long, spiral staircase that lead to the prison, with my heart in my throat. The place had always an eerie feeling, but in that moment, in the middle of the night, it felt almost haunted. The darkness of the narrow corridors, the only light coming from the torches on the walls creating unsettling shadows… I got goosebumps all over my skin.

But maybe the location had nothing to do with my nervousness. Maybe, the reason I was feeling so completely on edge laid in the person I was about to meet.

I hadn’t seen Lance in more than two weeks, and not for lack of trying. Miiko had sent members of the guard to each corner of Eldarya, trying to collect information on where he might be, even my boyfriend, I hadn’t seen him in a while.

I had asked to stay at HQ, the official reason was to continue with my assignment of trying to identify any traitor inside the guard. In reality… I couldn’t leave knowing Lance was actually close by.

I had looked for him in the forest, in the plains that surrounded HQ, even along the beach. I had looked for him anywhere and hadn’t found a single trace of him. I could see only one explanation for that: he didn’t want me to find him.

Then, that evening, I had found a message in my room, just a location and a time. I knew immediately it was from him, I felt it in my bones.

I pushed the heavy door of the prison and stepped in the even darker and creepier room, debating if leaving the door open or not. I had no idea what Lance wanted from me, but what would’ve happened if someone saw me with him?

In the worst case I would’ve been labelled as a traitor too, my future uncertain, maybe imprisonment, maybe death. Knowing the guard’s MO it wouldn’t have surprised me. But in the best scenario? I would’ve at least needed to provide a lengthy explanation, clarifying my relationship with the dragon, and that probably… certainly… scared me even more than death.

How can you explain something you have no idea about?

“You came,” his voice startled me, and I turned around to find him stepping from behind a pillar at the furthest side of the room. “Good, I like obedient girls.”

His condescending tone irked me immediately, and some of my stress left to make room for annoyance.

“Lance, what do you want from me? Have you come to turn yourself in?” I asked, knowing already the answer.

He simply chuckled.

“Not quite. I told you I would need your assistance with something from time to time.”

“And I thought I’d made very clear that I wanted nothing to do with you and your so-called business,” I replied crossing my arms in a confident attitude that almost fooled even myself.

He walked towards me and I felt the sudden need to run away and hide, but kept my stance, no way I would show him any weakness.

“Of course, that’s why you’ve been looking for me all over the place,” he tsked infuriatingly, “and I thought pure, little angels could not lie.”

“Miiko ordered all members of the guards to look for you,” I answered between my teeth, an-half truth the best explanation I could provide, “and since you made so I can’t tell anything about you, I have to take things into my own hands and try to stop you myself.”

“That’s cute,” he simply replied with is typical smirk, and I so wanted to hit him. “But that’s precisely why we are here tonight, thanks to your meddling in my business I find myself shorthanded and in need of assistance.”

He looked at me from head to toe and said, “take off your clothes.”

“Excuse me?” I replied taken aback.

His smirk grew even bigger.

“It’s not what you think, even though… maybe another time,” he moved towards the shore, stopping at the edge of the water.

“Following the gracious hospitality I received in this place not so long ago, the unbearable kitsune cast a spell so that now it’s impossible for me to access HQ through the sea,” he explained gesturing towards the limited water expanse that covered one side of the prison. “I have other means to get here of course, as you can clearly see, but I need this passage, and you’re going to help me get it back. It’s only fair, since you’re the reason the mermaid lost her convenient position as a double agent.”

That was true, I couldn’t tell the guard about Lance thanks to the spell he’d cast on me and, to be honest, I didn’t even know if I wanted to anyway. After our time on Memoria I was extremely confused about the dragon, the blue sacrifice, the guard and the whole Eldarya. But I couldn’t show up back at HQ and give Miiko nothing to work with, and I had no problem in telling everyone about Enthraa and her role in helping Lance escape imprisonment.

“That’s it?” I asked sceptical, “you just want to open an escape route from HQ?”

“That’s it,” he nodded.

It could’ve been worse, he clearly had several points of access at his disposal already, what was one more? And maybe… if I helped him in this, if I showed myself willing, useful even… he would open up about his plans. Maybe I would be able to find out about Valkyon.

“Fine,” I replied sounding almost bored. “What do I have to do?”

“Take off your clothes and get in the water.”

“Do I really need to be naked do this? I don’t care about getting my clothes wet.”

“Sure,” he said raising his hands, fake innocence painted cross his face. “If you ran into someone on your way back to your room and have a good enough excuse for your walking around HQ completely drenched in the middle of the night, then by all means, be my guest.”

I looked at him annoyed, he had a point but I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of acknowledging it.

“And what exactly do I need to do once I’m in the water?”

“Simply walk up to that rock,” he replied pointing to a narrowing of the rocky walls, “lay a hand on the shield blocking the passage, you’ll be able to feel it, and repeat these words.”

He chanted a few verses in the ancient language and made me repeat them several times to memorise them.

“I have to do the same thing from the other side, wait a couple of minutes before spelling the chant, you’ll see me once I’m there, I know a shortcut.”

Of course he did, I thought looking at his satisfied expression, he must’ve felt very pleased he was getting his way, as usual.

Once he left the prison, I walked to the edge of the water.

I started to feel extremely nervous at the thought of dipping into it, I had almost drowned again just a couple of weeks before. _I could just go back to bed and pretend nothing has happened…_

Yes, and find myself again in the clutches of a pissed-off psychopathic dragon.

I slowly started undressing, thinking about how I would manage to make Lance talk after we’d broken Miiko’s spell. Once I was left only in my white bra and panties, I hid all my clothes behind a pillar and, taking a big breath, stepped into the water.

Gosh it was cold! The freezing temperature, however, helped distracting me from more unpleasant thoughts of doom and drowning. Also, the sea there was very shallow, once I got to the point Lance had showed me, it barely reached my chest.

I waited there, in the cold water, for a few minutes, until I saw him at the other side of the invisible barrier, and my breath got stuck in my throat.

I’d never seen him wear anything other than his black and red armour, and now… he wasn’t wearing anything at all, at least not on the upper part of his body. I couldn’t see what was going on below because the water reached him halfway through his waist. But he must have fully dipped at some point, probably swimming to get there, because he was completely wet, even his hair, falling in short, messy locks around his face.

And, well… I didn’t want to stare, but I found myself unable to do anything else while he walked confidently towards me. His body was pure perfection, hard and chiselled, and I had the uncontrollable desire to draw all his muscles with my fingertips.

His skin was tanned and made for a striking contrast against the silver of his hair and his icy blue eyes.

Eyes that were staring right back at me.

He raised his hand mid-air and I did the same, touching the invisible wall separating us, and I felt like electricity running through my body.

I couldn’t hear a sound from the other side, but when I saw his lips moving I knew he was reciting the spell, so I did the same.

For ten long minutes we stayed there, in that wet, dark cavern, our eyes locked, reciting those ancient words, a magical aura surrounding us. And the longer we chanted, the thinner I could feel the barrier getting until, at some point, it wasn’t the cold, intangible wall I could feel under my fingers, but his very warm and solid hand.

And for a moment, one single moment, instead of quickly lowering mine, I went to intertwine my fingers with his, and he let me do it, with a surprised and slightly fascinated expression on his face.

“You…”

“We’re out of options, Jamon.”

Miiko’s voice came clearly from the other side of the door and, before I could take even one step, I felt myself being grabbed by the waist and pushed behind a rock.

Lance’s strong body was at my back, one hand over my mouth, the other around my waist, keeping me flushed against him.

I heard the door of the prison open and two people step into the room. Miiko and Jamon were talking, a private conversation that they probably didn’t want anyone to hear, but I had more pressing matters than respecting their privacy, they couldn’t find me there, not with Lance, and not after what I’d just done.

“Don’t make a sound little angel,” he cruelly whispered in my ear, “I wouldn’t want to have to snap this pretty, little neck of yours.”

He moved his hand from my mouth to my neck, but I didn’t feel in danger, the way he was holding me was different from when he’d almost chocked me on his boat. He was applying just enough pressure to make his point and sound threatening, but he was also strangely attentive.

Miiko and Jamon kept talking, walking back and forward around the prison. I was worried they would get close enough to feel the absence of magic, giving up the fact that the barrier had been breached. I tried to alert Lance, but he tightened his hold around my neck and said, “You better shut that pretty little mouth before I put it to work, doll.”

I froze on the spot, thinking about several possible scenarios in my head.

His lips came closer to my ear, each breath sending shivers down my spine, “Or maybe… you would love that, wouldn’t you?”

I was about to voice my protest when I felt his teeth on the shell of my ear, biting lightly. After the quick escape behind the rock, I had gotten wet pretty much everywhere, even the length of my hair. With his nose he moved them to my back, exposing the side of my neck that wasn’t currently held tightly by his hand. His lips started kissing slowly, almost sweetly, and his tongue came out, licking the most sensitive spot right above the curve of my neck.

It was… incredibly sensual, I felt my knees going week and I was happy he was holding me so tightly, otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to stay up. Each caress of his tongue sent pangs of pleasure directly to my core. I was loving it… and I couldn’t and shouldn’t have felt that way.

“Please…” I begged closing my eyes, “I can’t… you can’t…”

His hand moved from my waist to my chest, grabbing my breast above the drenched fabric of my bra. He squeezed tightly, almost painfully, and said, “Of course I can.”

His mouth lowered again to de crook of my neck but, instead of kissing me again, he put his lips on a precise spot and sucked.

I moaned surprised, and he moved his other hand from my neck back to my mouth, his index finger slipping between my lips. And while he kept sucking on my neck, I found myself absentmindedly copying his movements by lightly licking and sucking his finger inside my mouth.

I had lost all consciousness of what was going on around me, I could only feel the mixture of pain and pleasure he was giving me and his strong body enveloping mine, particularly something big and hard pressing against my bottom.

“Mine.”

I knew he had marked me, and as soon as I felt his lips leaving my neck he moved us, shifting position so that now I was pressed with my back against the rock, and he was between my legs, holding my weight with both his hands under my ass.

Looking at me from top to bottom, I knew he had a clear picture of my most sensitive areas through my white underwear, that was now completely drenched and plastered over my body like a second skin, leaving nothing to the imagination.

“I’m not yours,” I replied.

It clearly wasn’t the right thing to say, because he moved one of his hands back to my neck, holding a little more tightly than necessary. Heat in his angry eyes, he came even closer, pushing his hard length that was luckily trapped inside his black slacks, against my core.

“What… do you think you’re his?” he replied cruelly, moving back and forward against my most sensitive spot. I loved everything he was doing to me, but I raised one hand to hold myself to the rock at my back instead to his shoulder, not wanting to encourage further intimacy, not wanting him to figure out how much I wanted him, and a looked at him with challenge.

A light of understanding passed in his eyes at my silence and my gesture of clear refusal. He grunted and started moving even faster, I bit my lips, trying to suppress any moan.

“Could he make you feel as good as I do?” He asked with his evil smirk. “I’m gonna fuck you so hard that you forget you ever even met that asshole.”

He moved his lips dangerously closer to mine, so much so that, despite his still tight grip around my neck, I knew that if I just tilted my head back a little, I would end up kissing him.

I’d never been so tempted before in my life.

“But not today.”

Without even realising it, I felt myself being dropped in the water. Completely distracted by his body all over mine, by his cruel but heated gaze, by his movements and the pleasure they were giving me, falling underwater felt like a sudden cold shower. Fortunately, the sea was shallow enough in that point that I easily resurfaced. The moment I was back on the shore, I noticed that I was alone, not only Lance had disappeared, but Miiko and Jamon had left at some point without me even realising it, completely distracted by what was happening behind that rock.

I was seething, I’d allowed him to do anything he’d wanted to me, and I’d enjoyed it!

He’d even marked me, I thought while touching my sensitive neck. Retrieving my clothes, I started dressing quickly.

Next time… I was going to show him, he couldn’t treat me like this, but inside me I wasn’t sure if I was more pissed for what he’d started or for what he hadn’t finished.

With one final look at the empty cavern, I headed towards the long staircase that was going to lead me back to my room, hoping I would run into no one on my way there.


	3. Chapter 3

"I missed you so much, Erika," he told me while hugging me tightly to his chest.

I hadn't seen my boyfriend in weeks. I'd missed him too, of course I had, but… I couldn't deny my thoughts had been otherwise occupied lately.

It was late at night, I'd heard he was about to return any moment and I'd run to meet him halfway, we were now strolling hand in hand in the beautiful park and we’d just reached the Hundred years cherry tree.

He told me everything about his unfruitful mission in Balenvia where he hadn't managed to find one single trace of Valkyon. And I told him everything… well, not exactly everything, but a lot about what had been going on at HQ, about the lifeless Crystal that was making Eldarya even more unstable than what it had been before, and how Miiko and Huang Hua where trying to find a solution.

"There've been reports of earthquakes, not strong ones but they've been happening with more and more frequency," I explained.

"I know," he replied massaging his temples, "there've been a couple in Balenvia too."

"You must be tired," I said seeing his pained expression, "with all this travelling lately... you should probably go to bed."

"Are you coming with me?" He asked with a certain innuendo in his voice. A month ago I would've said yes immediately, but something was off now, and I didn't want to admit to myself the reason.

"I don't think so, you need to rest and that's clearly not what you have in mind."

"Mmm…" he replied with a smile, tilting his head. "There're many ways to recharge your batteries, I bet you need some "rest" too…"

I chuckled lightly, I was tempted… maybe falling back into our routine and spending the night together was exactly what I needed to take my mind off other unnecessary and problematic thoughts.

"Did you just look me up and down and then bit your lip?" He asked with a smirk.

"Maybe…"

"Cause if you did we're having sex right now."

"Now? Here?" I uttered surprised.

He mumbled his assent and took a step towards me, taking me in his arms again.

I felt… comfortable, safe, nothing to do with the constant fear, angst and… excitement I'd found myself experiencing lately. When he took my face in his hands and lowered his lips on mine in a tender kiss I sighed. This was familiar and sweet.

I didn't want sweet.

Pushing him on a bench close by, I straddled him, my hands in his hair I attacked his mouth with passion.

This… I wanted this… but it wasn't enough, it felt wrong. I found myself frustrated by the feeling of his hair being of the wrong length, his height and build were also wrong but, most of all, when I looked into his eyes I was disappointed at finding they weren't icy blue. They were looking at me with a tenderness that had nothing to do with the cruel but heated stare I envisioned in my mind every time I went to sleep.

Fuck, I was so messed up.

I was about to put a stop to this when I saw him.

In his black armor Lance… no, Ashkore, he was wearing his mask, was standing there not exactly hiding in the bushes, and even through his mask I could tell he was looking at me, immobile like an impressive, frightening statue.

I remembered the last time I'd seen him, in the prison, where he'd touched me and marked me as if I were his property, and then he'd disappeared out of thin air and I hadn't heard from him in days.

So, when my boyfriend started unbuttoning my tunic, I let him. One button after the other, slowly, until none were left, exposing my chest to two sets of hungry stares. I never broke my gaze from those red, cruel dragon eyes, not even for one second.

And when my boyfriend started kissing from my lips, along the length of my neck, all the way to my breasts, I never stopped staring at that masked monster standing just a few feet from me.

And when those sweet lips that were worshipping my body latched to one nipple and started lightly sucking and licking, I finally closed my eyes and arched my back, granting him better access, probably showing more enthusiasm than what I was actually feeling. 

But when I felt that mouth leaving my body and not coming back after a few seconds, I opened my eyes to find Lance's face in front of me, no mask covering his angry icy eyes, looking at me like a man possessed.

My boyfriend was limp on the bench passed out following a hit to the head if the branch on the ground was of any indication.

Before I could open my mouth to protest, he grabbed me by the hair and dragged me off the bench, the sting in my scalp barely noticeable compared to my worry for my boyfriend's conditions.

"He's fine," Lance said when I tried to reach for him, "unfortunately."

I heard him groan and I knew he would be ok once he woke up.

"You, on the other hand," Lance continued, grabbing me by the arm and dragging me towards HQ, "are in big trouble. I think it's finally time to take your suggestion and get rid of Eldarya's mighty saviour."

"Wh-what?" I replied shocked, but he didn't seem to care giving me any explanation. 

"Is this it, then? Are you going to kill me?" I insisted.

"It is the simplest solution as you pointed out yourself," he replied, trying to sound calm, bored even, but I knew better. He was furious.

"How come the sudden change of heart?" I asked trying to keep my cool, "you were almost friendly the other day. What happened meanwhile? Weren't you enjoying the show just a moment ago? Or maybe… are you actually jealous?"

He stopped abruptly and grabbed me by the hair again, forcing me to look up at him.

"Do you seriously have a death wish?" He cried out like a crazy man, we were close to the village, but I hoped not close enough for anyone to come and check out the commotion. I could deal with an angry dragon, at least I hoped so… but I didn't want anyone to get hurt.

"Do you seriously have so little consideration about your own life? I just told you I'm going to kill you, why would you try to get a rise out of me?"

"I'm about to die, right? I have nothing to lose, I might as well piss you off," I spat out challenging.

"You… do you think I'm going to spare you by acting cute? My mind is made up."

_He thought that me being a brat was… cute?_

"Or maybe… you wanna try to persuade me with more feminine tactics?" He said looking at my open tunic that barely covered my breasts. "I should take advantage of the situation while I still can and fuck you out of my system."

"You're never taking me to bed." I replied disgusted. "Never."

"Oh sweet little aengel…" he said with his crooked evil grin, "who said anything about a bed."

Pushing me up to a tree, he grabbed me by the neck and whispered, the sweetness of his tone at odd contrast with his words, “If you didn't like my teasing then, why were you moaning?” You seemed ready to go with that loser, and were more than ready with me just a few days ago… are you really an aegel? Or more like a slutty demon, ready to spread you legs for any willing cock coming your way?"

"Wow… seeing me making love with my boyfriend really made a number on you. Who is the loser here?"

He punched the tree with strength, leaves falling on our heads.

“News flash Lance, who I sleep with has nothing to do with you. Women usually prefer someone who doesn’t kidnap and threaten to kill them every time they feel like it.”

He tightened his hold around my neck and grabbed a dagger from his back pocket, pointing it at my chest. I just stared at him, challenge in my eyes. When he raised it, he planted exactly where I thought he would, in the tree trunk, next to my face. It was the second time he did something like this, he had already come very close to kill me in Memoria, just to stop at the very last moment.

“You can’t, can you?”

He just looked at me, desperate.

“Erika!”

I heard voices and footsteps, they’d found us. Miiko and all the members of the Light Guard surrounded us and I could only imagine what they must think of the scene in front of them, Lance pinning me to a tree, one hand around my neck, the other holding a dagger.

He’d barely had time to take a step back dragging me with him, that something else happened, Lance’s men arrived, the ones from the boat, who must have been close by and heard the commotion.

The two sides were facing each other, Lance and I in the middle.

This was going to end badly.

I didn’t want them to fight, didn’t want anyone to get hurt. This war was absurd, each side was both right and wrong, I needed to do something.

I was overwhelmed by an insane visceral need to protect them all, I had no idea what was happening but I felt it in my subconscious, my skin started to glow, a warm light surrounded me and, from behind my back, a pair of soft, white wings sprung, and I felt myself raise in the air.

Everyone was looking at me shocked, and I heard several voices cry out the word aengel.

The cat was out of the bag.


	4. Chapter 4

I was panting lightly as I stepped on top of the steep hill I was, by now, extremely familiar with. Even in the darkness of a moonless night I was able to move around the beautiful temple and reach the edge of the cliff.

The last time I’d been there I’d almost died. Again.

I looked at the dark abyss of the stormy ocean below and remembered the taste of the salty water in my mouth and the pressure on my lungs.

I was so scared then, but I wasn’t now, not anymore.

I thought about the man who’d absorbed all my thoughts, the man who’d pushed me in more ways than one.

I’d been falling then, and I was now.

The cool air of the night felt good on my skin, and I closed my eyes, basking in the sweet sensation of the light wind moving my hair from my face. The first really quiet moment in a while.

After what happened that night at HQ, everything had turned upside down. I’d finally unlocked my aengel powers, but to what cost?

As soon as those huge white ethereal wings had sprung at my back, people had started looking at me with awe and fear, but something even more incredible had happened.

Leiftan, my Leiftan… I’d managed to see him for what he really was. Nobody else could, but in my new enhanced state I’d been able to recognise his demonic features, his dark wings and emerald eyes. He was the deamon that had been terrorising the whole Eldarya for so long. He was the cause of so much suffering and death. He was the danger the Oracle and Fenrir had tried to warn me about.

He was the real traitor.

And I knew, I KNEW that he’d saved me in purgatory. I knew he hadn’t been alone in all this. I knew he had his reasons, that the Blue Sacrifice had been unfair and had probably caused more suffering than what it was supposed to prevent. I knew all this.

And I knew he loved me.

I loved him too.

But…

I was heartbroken, he’d lied to me so much and for so long that I would never be able to trust him again. Everyone had, since the moment I’d stepped foot in this absurd world.

Except for one person. He’d been the only one to show his true colours from the very beginning. He’d been the only one to constantly tell me the truth.

And that was exactly what I needed right now, a moment of truth, something real in the constant mess that was my life.

That’s why I’d “borrowed” a ship and made my way to the island. I’d left a note saying that I would be back once my head was clear and to not look for me. And I’d come to Memoria because the reason was so simple and made so much sense that I felt almost ridiculous for not thinking about it before.

What was the only place where a dragon could be sure he and his brother would never be found? The place where only someone of his same race could access.

And me.

I was going to ask Fenrir for access, beg if I needed to, because I had to see _him_.

“I knew you would come back here sooner or later,” a familiar voice said at my back.

Maybe I didn’t need to access the sanctuary after all.

I turned around to find Lance at the opposite side of the cliff, he must have felt my presence on the island and followed me up to the temple.

“Why are you here, little aengel?” he asked with his usual crooked smile. “Are you planning on making my job easier for me and jump?”

I took a step away from the cliff and looked at him with my best _I’m-not-buying-your-bullshit_ kind of look.

“We both know you’ve had plenty of chances to kill me and, for some reason, you’ve never really tried. Even that pitiful attempt on this very cliff, when you knew I was surrounded by people ready to rescue me… no,” I shook my head, taking another step forward, “you don’t want me dead. Not one bit. Why is that?”

I barely had the time to blink that I found him standing right in front of me, dangerously close.

“Maybe I’ve just been waiting for the right moment,” he said cruelly, “maybe I wanted to fuck with your head and body first.”

“And maybe you should do just that then,” I replied and, as he raised an eyebrow looking surprised, I grabbed him by his armour and pulled him closer to me, our lips almost touching, “fuck me.”

He looked taken aback for a second, then grinned, grabbed my hips and whispered, “are you sure, little angel? What about that boyfriend of yours?”

“That’s my business, not yours. I just want something easy, something real, not surrounded by layers of deceit and false promises. With you… I know exactly what you want, my body, nothing more nothing less, and that’s fine with me.”

Looking at me as if he was meditating on my words, he finally tightened his hold on my hips and I suddenly found myself lying with my back on something hard and cold. I realised he’d positioned me on the stone altar, and set himself between my legs, hovering me.

“Is this really what you want?” his expression indecipherable on that cruelly beautiful face of his. “What do you want? Tell me.” He ordered, as his hands moved along my thighs and slowly removed my pants and underwear at the same time.

“I… I want distraction. I don’t want to think about… anything.”

“As you wish,” he replied with his crooked grin, and he spread my legs, as much as I was able to.

He took a few moments to just stare at my most intimate spot, and I felt myself blush, embarrassed. Then I heard him whisper _Fucking perfect_ under his breath, and saw him removing his gloves, before putting his hands on me again.

I remembered how we’d touched hands in the cave, that gesture so spontaneous and almost innocent compared to what was happening right now.

One hand went to hold my leg still, the other came directly to my core, his fingers massaging between my folds.

“You’re already so wet,” he said mischievously, “you’ve wanted this for a while, haven’t you?”

“Mmm…” I mumbled unintelligibly as he slipped one finger inside me, I raised my head to look at the starry night sky, not wanting him to inspect my soul with those unsettling icy eyes. “Just… just shut up and fuck me.”

He simply chuckled and slipped another finger inside, pumping in and out, his movements expertly precise.

It was so, so good. But I wanted more, I wanted him.

“Lance…” I moaned, and he raised his head from the spot between my legs he was staring fascinatedly at. Our gazes met, and I saw something undecipherable in his eyes. “I need you… please…”

The look he gave me was one of a man torn, between what I had no idea, I was literally spread like a sacrificial offering in front of him, his fingers already inside of me.

Looking as if he’d made up his mind, he started pumping his even faster, moving his thumb on my clit. That was too good, I came almost immediately, loudly, arching my back looking at the dark starry sky.

“Have I distracted you to your satisfaction?” he asked coldly again, while I was panting my way out of my high.

Removing his fingers out of my core, he licked each one of them, tasting my essence on him, his eyes never leaving mine. “You should go.”

“W-what?” I replied surprised, sitting up.

“It’s clear that you’re just upset, but your allegiance still lies with that bunch of snakes you like to call friends,” he threw me my clothes and I put them on, confused.

“Open your beautiful eyes, little aengel, and see exactly what those people are and what they’re willing to do to save their own worthless skin.”

He reached the edge of the cliff and, before taking another step, turned around and added, “history repeats itself. We’ll see each other again soon enough.”

Before I could ask for any explanation he disappeared, and I was left unsatisfied and with thousands of questions running through my mind.


	5. Chapter 5

I was a mess.

I’d spent the last weeks trying to figure out what to do with my life. Who to trust and, at the same time, how to save Eldarya.

Things were getting worse every day, earthquakes were getting stronger and more frequent, high tides and storms. Even the volcanic region was acting up, with new eruptions every week.

It seemed like the world was about to end soon.

I was pacing around my room trying to think about my next steps. Once Leiftan had been outed for the lying traitor he was, he’d been captured and was now held in the cell, strictly monitored. My heart still hurt at the thought, and I swallowed hard trying to keep my cool. I’d taken possession of some of his books before Ykhar could put her hands on them, and I found some very interesting rituals that only aengels (or deamons) could perform.

One of these was about accessing the deepest, innermost thoughts of whoever you most desired, something that would have been extremely useful when we had to deal with Naytili. But… alas, it had been his plan all along, hadn’t it? Let us run in circles and waste time so he could accomplish whatever he had devised.

Well, now I was going to use it on him. Poetic justice indeed.

I only had a tiny doubt about whose thoughts my heart most desired to access, his or Miiko’s. These past weeks I’d kept an eye on her, and I knew, without a doubt, she was keeping secrets from me.

Again.

Everyone in my life kept lying to me, but now I was strong enough now to take matters into my own hands, I was sick and tired of everyone making a fool of me.

Leiftan had lied to me since day one.

Miiko and the Light guard had tricked me in more ways than I could count, using me as a bait multiple times and destroying any chance of going back to my world and reunite with a family who would remember and love me. Apparently, they were still plotting something behind my back.

And… _him_.

I felt like punching the wall at the mere thought of _him_.

 _But he is the only one who has never lied to you, isn’t he?_ A little voice whispered in my head.

I didn’t care, he had kidnapped me, threatened me, almost killed me multiple times and, despite all that, when I’d been stupid enough to offer myself to him on a silver plate, he had rejected me.

I didn’t want to see _him_ ever again.

Someone knocked on my door. It was an over-excited Aleja who’d run to tell me that the whole HQ was on high alert because Lance had been spotted in the Alchemy lab. I snorted in my mind, it hadn’t been the first time he’d stolen something from the guard lately, and they’d never managed to capture him.

I hadn’t even tried, at this point I just wanted to stay away from him and didn’t want to take part in this battle they had going on, they were both wrong anyway.

However, today he had perfect timing. If everyone was running around HQ trying to capture him, security around Leiftan would be looser, giving me the perfect chance to proceed with the ritual.

Having made up my mind, I gathered all the ingredients I needed, ingredients I had “borrowed” here and there in preparation for this day. There was already a thief running around pilfering HQ, no one suspected me in the least.

I paused for a moment thinking about how the old me, not even a couple of months ago, would have never conceived stealing, tricking the people around her and preparing illegal rituals.

The new me, however, was pissed.

I run through the chaotic corridors, people were busy inspecting every room and hole, it was perfect. I took the stairs that lead to the cave and, in a few seconds, I was in front of the prison door, no guard in sight.

I stepped in the room and my eyes immediately found Leiftan in his cage, a physical and magical prison much stronger than the one from before. This one was enough to hold a grown deamon, allowing for daily (but fruitless) interrogations. The sheer power required had been taking its toll on Miiko and everyone involved.

“Erika…” he said, immediately standing up, coming as close to me as the cell allowed. “What’s going on?”

“Apparently your business partner has showed up again for one of his nightly shopping expeditions in the Alchemy lab, everyone is trying to catch him to say hi.”

He scowled and was about to reply when he noticed I was setting up the place for the ritual.

“What are you doing?” he asked, “wait… I know what you are doing. You can’t Erika, it’s too dangerous, it requires lots of power and ability.”

“Stop cuddling me and treating me like a dumb, powerless fool,” I cried out.

“I don’t… Erika, I love you. You’re my soulmate. I’ll tell you anything you want to know, you don’t need to do this.”

“Because you’ve always been so forthcoming so far, right?!” I asked arching an eyebrow, sitting in the middle of the circle I’d drawn on the floor.

I started chanting the words of the spell, but as I was about to complete the incantation something happened.

The door burst open and Lance, followed by Miiko, Jamon and the whole Light guard, entered the cave. Damn… how could I’ve forgotten about the escape route I’d helped create not so long ago? Was I going to enter Leiftan’s mind, now? Or Miiko’s? Anyway, I was going to get some answers out of this.

The moment the last word came out of my mouth, time stopped and everyone got stuck frozen mid-movement. A blue light surrounded me and then quickly spread in the whole area, as if searching the right target, the one my heart most desired to connect with.

I watched it reach the person physically closest to me, Leiftan, and move on. It touched Nevra, Ezarel, Miiko, and still expanded and searched, until it reached the person I least suspected.

And then, it was only darkness.

* * *

_What a waste of time, I thought as we reached the top of the cliff. Memoria was supposed to hold the answers to all my questions, I’d done anything these past years, stolen, betrayed, murdered to be here and meet my people. To understand and free them from their suffering. And now that I was one step away from getting everything I wanted, I was stuck on this island with the girl._

_I looked at her, she appeared so carefree, so innocent, while dancing with those worthless creatures. She had no idea, did she? About how rotten this world really was._

_I almost envied her._

_She kept dancing at the melody, surrounded by their lights, and I couldn’t help but stare, almost captivated by her movements, by her light-hearted smile, her aura._

_I realised I’d taken a few steps forward as if to join her, only when she stopped and turned around, bumping into me._

_“It’s only me…” I replied at her startled face, trying to reassure her._

_Reassure her? Why would I? She was supposed to fear me._

_Our eyes met and something twisted inside me, as if something long time dead had just awakened._

* * *

What was that?

I thought when I was back in the darkness, bodyless but my conscious again my own.

I’d recognised that moment, that night on top of Memoria’s cliff. I’d seen myself, but with someone else’s eyes.

I was in Lance’s memories, I could experience his thoughts and feelings.

Before I could understand the meaning of all that, I lost myself again.

* * *

_Chanting the last words of the spell, I felt the barrier between our bodies disappear and my hand touch her own._

_She felt… soft and warm. Even though I could tell she was feeling slightly cold in that cavern, her body wet, her white underwear leaving nothing to the imagination._

_Suddenly, I was feeling warm too._

_Looking into her violet eyes, I tried to discern what she was thinking. She was usually an open book, displaying all her emotions on her face for everyone to read and take advantage of, but in that moment, she was looking back at me as surprised and as captivated as I was. Before I could make up my mind and take a step back, she intertwined her fingers with mine. What…_

_“We’re out of options, Jamon…”_

_The ogre and the damn kitsune! How distracted could I have been to not hear them coming?!_

_I hid us behind a rock, threatening the girl not to make a sound. This looked like a secret meeting of some kind and I wanted to hear what they were discussing._

_“I don’t like it either,” the uptight kitsune said, “but the Oracle is dead, and Eldarya is starting to give first signs of imminent destruction. I don’t know how long we have left.”_

_“Jamon knows Miiko, but…”_

_The girl tried to speak, I head to shut her up, but threats could only do so much. The feeling of her soft, warm body gave me a few ideas, so I lowered my lips to her skin and started kissing and biting on her neck and ear._

_This was… more pleasing than I thought it would be. And I’d thought about doing things to her many times. How could I not? I was sure she would be shivering and blushing in barely concealed pleasure as she was doing right now, but I had now idea how this would affect me. I had to keep my thoughts straight._

_“We have to complete the sacrifice, there’s no other choice.”_

_Ah… that was it, then. I knew it was coming. I knew these selfish, disgusting people would not hesitate to sacrifice us as soon as they got the chance. I’d been correct all along, taking my brother away had been the smartest choice._

_“There are two dragons left, the deamon and… an aengel.”_

_I tightened my hold on the girl, they knew about her then, a wave of possessiveness I was unable to explain rushed through me._

_“I don’t want to, but it’s the only choice we have…”_

_They wanted to sacrifice her. The sweet, little thing shivering in my arms. She was so innocent but at the same time so strong and brave. Taking on the man who had kidnapped and threatened her with such confidence. Helping the useless people who had taken everything away from her the same way they’d taken away everything from me and my brother._

_They had no right to touch her, she was mine._

_MINE._

_Again, I lowered my lips to her neck and staked my claim._

* * *

I was back into my own mind, in the same intangible nothingness as before.

Confused and surprised, but now I knew what Miiko was keeping from me. She wanted to sacrifice me to save Eldarya, and not just me, Valkyon, Leiftan and Lance too.

I felt betrayed all over again. A part of me knew she might see no other choice to save Eldarya and its people, that same part even agreed with her, maybe that was my destiny, maybe that was my purpose in this story, to die in order to save the world.

But… it wasn’t just me. I couldn’t even begin to accept the fact that three men who I cared about… yes, I cared about all three of them, had to die with me. I could die for the world, but could I take them with me?

No.

As soon as I realised that, I lost myself again.

* * *

_The girl was looking at me with challenge in her eyes. How could she be here, so confidently facing the man who’d been about to kill her just a few days ago? I’d been seriously ready to do it, it was my intention and the best possible solution to all my problems, if she couldn’t be sacrificed there was no chance Eldarya could be saved. And there would’ve been no reason for them to try to sacrifice my brother too._

_I’d been so stupid, trying to find thousands possible ways to avoid that, one crazier than the other, but when I’d seen her in the garden, under the Hundred Years Cherry Tree with that filthy deamon’s hands all over her, I’d lost my mind._

_I was ready to put an end to everything, ready to be done with this._

_And in the end… I couldn’t. I just couldn’t._

_She’d laughed at me, mocked me for my ineptitude, the same way she was doing now._

_She knew I couldn’t kill her, even if a part of me wanted to._

_She’d finally found out that her sweet, nice boyfriend wasn’t so sweet and nice after all, and she’d run straight to me out of spite and hurt. She wanted to use me to forget and punish._

_For once, our intentions aligned._

_I quickly undressed her and lied her on the altar on top of Memoria’s cliff. Looking at her from above, half naked and willing… ready for me… she was a sight for sore eyes._

_The moment I touched her, I knew she was exactly what I needed. I’d never seen anything so beautiful and perfect in my life and I was ready to lose myself in her._

_For one brief moment I thought that even my twisted, sinful self could deserve something so pure and strong._

_But then I saw her face, looking at the night sky. Her words, so far and distant, and I knew she wasn’t really here. And I realised, without a doubt, that I wanted everything from her, not just her body._

_I wanted her heart, her mind and her soul._

* * *

“Are you having fun?” a voice said when I was back in the void. It wasn’t really a voice, there was no mouth to pronounce words and sounds, but the message was clear anyway.

“I’m sorry,” I projected, feeling like I needed to apologise for sneaking into his mind uninvited and… for other things.

“At least you know the truth about those sick, selfish bastards.”

“I know the truth about many things now…” I replied.

Silence fell for a few seconds, and I thought about everything I’d witnessed. The spell was supposed to show me his deepest feelings and most inner thoughts.

And, I’d seen me, just me. His mind was full of me.

“As soon as the spell is broken, we have exactly ten seconds to escape through the passage through sea. You can’t stay here, it’s too dangerous now.”

He hesitated, then added, almost pleadingly, “come with me.”

I could tell his tone was unsure, but it didn’t need to be, my mind was made up.

“Yes,” I simply replied. “Take me away, Lance.”


	6. Chapter 6

The first time I’d been on a boat with Lance I had no idea he was even there, hiding below deck for the whole duration of the trip to the Jade coast.

The second time he’d kidnapped me, knife at my throat, just to be able to escape HQ and get to Memoria.

Both times I hadn’t been a willing participant in that forced partnership.

This time though… it was completely my choice.

I rested my arms on the railing of the boat, looking at the lights in the distance, getting further away the longer we sailed.

Had I really left the guard for good? It sounded almost crazy to me. Those were my friends, people that I loved, and I was abandoning them to join their sworn enemy.

They were planning to sacrifice me though… the thought should’ve put things into perspective, truth was that part of me understood them, desperate times called for desperate measures.

But I wanted to live and, more importantly, I wanted my friends to live.

Friends… the word didn’t sound right in my mind.

Valkyon was a friend, no doubt about that, but I had to admit we’d always walked a thin line between friendship and something more. When we’d been possessed by the spirits of Yeu and Tihn and kissed, I’d seriously wondered about my feelings for him.

But then… there was Leiftan. He was the person I went to when I needed to talk, he was always there for me, so sweet and understanding, I fell head over heels for him. As much as he’d lied and hurt me there was no way I would let anyone kill him.

Time heels all wounds they say, and maybe it was true, but I wasn’t sure I would ever be able to feel again a love so pure and unconditional.

And then there was him.

I turned around to look at the third element of my equation.

Lance was at the wheel, guiding the boat with mastery. I looked at the rigid posture of his body in the dark armour, his severe gaze pointed towards the horizon while he took us away from HQ as quickly as possible. He hadn’t said a word to me since our escape, and in that moment I would’ve done anything to get into that head of his.

But the fact was… I’d been there. I’d seen his thoughts and as messy and complicated as they were one thing was clear: he felt something for me. What? I had no idea, but it was deep.

Also, it didn’t escape me the fact that the spell that was supposed to let me access the mind of whoever I desired the most had showed me his.

Yeah, friendship indeed.

Whatever we had was raw, messy, deep and… inevitable. I was done fighting this, I was done pretending.

So I stayed there, leaning against the railing, looking at him while he took us away. He didn’t look in my direction one single time, as if he were trying to avoid my gaze.

I would’ve been embarrassed if roles were reversed and he’d been the one accessing my memories and most intimate thoughts, but Lance didn’t do embarrassment. He wasn’t that kind of man. There was something else.

Sooner than I thought we stopped and I realised we were still in El… we’d simply circumnavigated the peninsula where HQ was built.

“Jump” he suddenly said, the first words he’d spoken to me in hours were an order… typical.

“What do you mean ‘jump’?” I asked crossing my arms, I wasn’t going to move one inch. “Aren’t we a little to close to the guard, here?”

“It means,” he replied tiredly, as if grasping for patience, “that the boat is damaged and we can’t go any further than this, we’re going to spend the night in the cave.”

“The cave?” I asked confused. “You mean the Immersed Cave? The one that is, you know, immersed?”

“Hence why I said jump, we need to swim to get there.”

“If you think that I’m going to…”

The words died in my mouth as soon as, with an annoyed grunt, he grabbed me by the waist and dropped me off the boat in the freezing night water.

The asshole!

I kicked my feet to raise to surface and find him already swimming towards the cave.

“Move your pretty ass, little aengel, we don’t have the whole night” he said from above his shoulder.

Cursing him in my mind, I followed him to the dark entrance in front of us.

I had been right, the cave was indeed submerged, but only partially. After a ten-minute swim we reached the shore or what was its dark, rocky version under the cave.

“It’s too dark,” I said once we reached the ground and I managed to feel my way to a mostly dry area.

“Well, why don’t you take care of it, instead of whining?” he replied, charming as ever. “You’re an aengel, light is kinda your thing.”

He was… actually right. Damn, I hated it. I concentrated on that spark I’d been feeling inside me since the moment my powers had awaken and pushed it to surface. Two seconds later I was covered in a pure, white light.

“Nice, he commented unimpressed from some point in front of me, “but I don’t think you want to spend the night as a human torch.”

“I don’t know what to do, it’s not like I had someone teaching me these past few weeks.” Well, I had one in theory, the only other aengel who could help me navigate my new powers, but he’d been locked in the prison and I’d been too angry to ask him for anything.

“You need to project the power towards the outside,” he replied, strangely patient. “I know your instincts tell you to keep it close, that it’s part of you, but exactly because it’s in you, you won’t lose it. Try it, picture it in your head and do it.”

I did it as he suggested, I closed my eyes and imagined a ball of light hovering us, strong and warm.

After a minute I opened them again and saw a decent sized ball of low intensity hovering our heads, a little too high than what I’d planned, still… it was a start.

The dim light was enough to give an idea of the area. I could tell the cave was huge, most of it was immersed but there were little areas, here and there, like the one we were on that were over the level of water.

I was sitting against one side of the rocky wall, Lance was sitting against the opposite one, but the place was so small that if I stretched out my legs I could easily touch his.

Without a word he started removing his armour.

“W-what are you doing?” I asked suddenly nervous.

He looked at me raising an eyebrow.

“I’m not going to spend the whole night wearing drenched clothes, and since you’re not able to produce anything warmer that that pitiful ball over there, I guess we need to undress.”

“W-wait… let me try again.”

I tried several times, I didn’t manage to produce anything warmer than a couple of matches. I was tired, after our escape from HQ we hadn’t stopped one moment, also I’d never learned any of that, what I did was purely by instinct. I needed a full night sleep, a good meal and a teacher.

With a sardonic smirk he resumed undressing and, trying with all my strength to keep my cool, I started doing the same.

“I bet this is the moment where you wished you’d escaped with the fire dragon, not the ice one.”

I looked at him unimpressed.

“There are many aspects that make me prefer the fire dragon.”

That shut him up. But what was I doing? I’d decided I wasn’t going to antagonise him anymore. That I was going to stay true to my feelings.

“But, right now, I’m exactly with whom I want to be.”

He looked at me seemingly annoyed, but I could tell he was surprised, I was starting to learn all his fake expression and telltale signs.

“And why would that be? You spend five minutes in my head and think you understand me now? Girl, you’re so out of your depths.”

“Am I?” We were both done to our underwear, without removing my gaze from his I lowered my bra straps, all his attention focusing on my movements.

“You’ve spent so much time alone in this angry Ashkore persona of yours that you don’t even have the guts to admit what you really feel and what you really want.”

I removed everything that was still on and stood there completely naked in front of him.

I thought he would come out with another snarky remark, another excuse of some kind but, taking one step, he grabbed me by the hips and with one swift movement I found myself with my back on the ground and him on top of me.

“You know…” he said with a heated look, “I’m done playing nice.”

“W-what? That was you… being nice?”

“Extremely nice, yes.”

“All the times you’ve manhandled me and snapped at me… you were being nice?” I asked sceptical.

“Foreplay,” he replied with his trademark smirk, while his hands moved to my waist and started raising up and up towards my chest.

“Even when you tried to kill me, more than once I might add?”

“You’re still alive, aren’t you?” he paused and, looking into my eyes, the most earnest and sincere I’d ever seen him, “You said it yourself… I can’t. I just can’t.”

My breath caught in my throat at his shaky words.

“Believe me, I tried,” he continued. “You know, you saw it. Killing you would’ve been the best way to ensure the success of all my plans, but it’s been a while since I realised that the end of the world is not worth the end of you.”

I raised my hand to cup his face, for the first time I’d known him, the ice in his eyes seemed to melt a little as he looked into mine. “If you can’t beat them, join them?” I said smiling, “I’m here with you, and I’m not going anywhere.”

He almost seemed relieved, but something else was there, something he was not telling me. But Lance was a complicated man, I couldn’t expect him to completely open up to me in one night after he had locked himself away for so many years. I raised my head and put my lips on his.

I kissed him slowly, tentatively, and when I was confident he wasn’t going reject me, I tangled my fingers into his hair and pushed him towards me, his weight pressing me into the rocky pavement of the cave.

He must have felt my discomfort because, with one movement, he grabbed me by the waist and changed our position, so that now I was sitting on top of him, straddling him.

This was so completely out of character for him, putting himself in a position of vulnerability, giving me power to do whatever I wanted to him.

I rested my hands on his abs and drew the lines of his muscles with my fingertips, in the dim light I’d created I could barely see his marks and scars, but I touched them all, with my hands, then with my lips and finally with my tongue.

I could feel him getting harder against my belly, and I was so ready for him. Without another moment of hesitation, I reached in his boxer briefs and took him in my hand.

He was huge and perfect, I couldn’t wait to feel him inside me. I looked into his blue, deep eyes and, where I usually could find only cold anger, now I saw heat, desire and something else. He stared into mine, and I was sure he could see the same. I’d never wanted anything as much as I wanted him in that moment. Without breaking our gazes apart, I lowered myself onto him.

Gosh… I was so full. As wet as I was, I had to take a second to adjust to his size inside me. Then, he rested his hands on my hips, and helped me guiding my movements.

That night, many things happened in that cave.

Our movements, in perfect synchrony, bringing us to the peak of pleasure.

His lips on my neck, my shoulders, my chest… sending shivers down my spine and goosebumps on my skin.

My hands in his hair, on his arms, grabbing for dear life as our movements got more and more frantic.

It was sex, it was passion, it was desperate and raw, but it was also deep and meaningful, and while none of use wanted to label it out of fear and leftover arrogance, I knew exactly what it was.

It was love.

* * *

Hours later, we were hiding in the middle of El’s forest, waiting for the right moment to sneak inside HQ undisturbed.

That morning, at dawn, once we were both resting trying to catch our breath, he told me that if we wanted to stop the Guard for good, we had to get to the Crystal and perform a ritual, one that would froze it in its current state and prevent any new sacrifice.

We had argued a little about what consequences this would’ve had on Eldarya, I didn’t want to sacrifice anyone but also wasn’t on board with his plan of destroying the world. Once he’d assured me that the ritual would nether worsen nor improve the land’s current situation (that was getting pretty bad by the minute anyway), I accepted.

His men were going to attack HQ from one side, granting us the perfect diversion to sneak into the Crystal room.

Indeed it went easier than expected. Among the commotion, no one noticed us. I knew he had plenty of experience getting in and out of HQ as he wished, so it wasn’t really a surprise.

He’d even been able to remove Miiko’s seals and put stronger ones once we were in.

The Crystal looked even worse now than when I’d seen him last only a few days ago. I felt slightly guilty for what we were about to do, but I knew that we currently had no other options.

I helped Lance set everything up, I didn’t know how this ritual worked and we hadn’t had time to properly discuss this morning.

“Take this,” he said passing me what looked like a water bottle with a small pouch.

“What do I have to do with this?”

“You’re going to need it later, you’ll see,” he replied almost cryptically. He looked very busy though, so I didn’t ask for extra information.

At some point I saw something I wasn’t expecting.

“Ugh… is that… a piece of bone?” I asked a little disgusted.

He didn’t reply and just took out other objects.

“Wait… I know what these are…”

Dragon Tears, Dragon Scales, Dragon Heart… I’d studied so much about the subject that I sure confident I was right.

“You… this is not a ritual… you’re opening a portal!”

Laying one last object on the improvised altar he had created, he burned a parchment that probably contained words I would never find out, and a big ominous-looking black hole opened at my back.

“I’m sorry little aengel, this was the first and last time I lied to you,” he said with his smirk that didn’t look at all like his usual one, he tried, but he looked sad and almost dejected.

“Lance! What are you doing?” I asked frantic, grabbing his arm.

“This world is doomed, there’s nothing you can do to save it, unless you want to sacrifice yourself in the process, and I won’t allow it. Go back to your world, your life is there, with the humans.”

He paused, then cupped my face and added, almost pleadingly.

“Live. Please.”

I wanted to protest, wanted to make him understand that it wasn’t his choice to make, that I wasn’t going to save myself and leave them all in trouble. I could see he had enough ingredients for one trip, he wasn’t going to come with me, and I knew he would never leave his brother to die here alone.

But before I could say anything, he kissed me. He kissed me with all he’d got, like he hadn’t done the previous night when we’d spent hours in each other’s arms, when he was still trying to put some distance between us, and now I knew the reason why. He’d been planning this for a while, all those times he’d sneaked into HQ stealing stuff, he was preparing for this.

Save me and damn the world at the same time.

We kissed with fervour and passion, there was everything in that kiss, anger, desire, hurt, longing and devotion.

When he finally broke his lips away from mine, I heard him whisper.

“I love you, Erika.”

Grabbing me by the arms, he pushed me into the portal.

The last thing I saw of Eldarya were his eyes, his beautiful, striking, icy eyes.

“Lance!” I cried out.

Then darkness, darkness and nothing else.

And I kept falling.

* * *

Epilogue

_“This is your only option,” I said after what felt hours of pointless discussion, but it couldn’t have been that long, there wasn’t enough time, the world was about to end._

_Miiko looked at me with hatred in her eyes, the whole guard did, they wanted to kill me, maybe, probably, but they knew deep down I was right and there was nothing else that could be done._

_“If we do this,” she said, “it’d be like a second Blue Sacrifice.”_

_“Similar, but not the same,” I replied annoyed by their stupidity. “No genocide this time, no senseless selective suicide, the price this time will be paid by everyone.”_

_I looked into their eyes, “this is going to take away from you everything you took away from her.”_

“Erika… Erika!” I felt someone call my name and woke up to find Candy shaking my shoulder.

“Geez… you slept the whole hour, luckily Miss Paltry didn’t see you, otherwise you’d have been in trouble.”

Ah, right… the personal development class.

It always took me a few moments to remember where I was when I had one of these dreams, which looked more real than reality itself, because I was back in Eldarya, looking at the world through _his_ eyes, experiencing _his_ thoughts.

But, alas, those were only dreams, Eldarya had been destroyed and everyone was dead.

When I woke up, a few months ago, in the forest on Earth close to the mushroom circle where this story had begun, I was desperate. I’d tried so hard to go back to my world and, now that I was there, I wanted to go back to Eldarya.

I couldn’t accept the fact that I was the only one who’d survived.

I couldn’t accept that my friends were all dead.

I couldn’t accept that _he_ was dead.

A part of me hated him for what he’d done, for taking the choice away from me.

Another loved him even more.

This was definitely the case when I realised that the water bottle he’d given me contained Lethe water, and a formula that reversed engineered the memory potion that had took everything away from me.

I was back into my world, back to my family, back to my life.

But I wasn’t the same person who’d stepped foot in that mushroom circle.

I tried to move on with my life, I really did. I went back to school for my last year of college, made new friends, went out, but everything felt off, as if I was living half a life.

And that spark… it was still there. I still felt it in me, but didn’t have the guts to call it to surface, as if it’d be too painful to access that part of me that I was supposed to forget.

But how could I? I kept having those strange dreams and, as absurd as it sounded, I kept seeing people from Eldarya everywhere I went.

Once I was sure I’d seen Kero in the library, there was a boy who looked exactly like him minus the horn. I even ran to him and hugged him, the poor guy was so distressed he fled the library.

Another time I thought Karuto was serving me at the cafeteria, he was wearing a protective mask though so I wasn’t completely positive. When I asked the man his name, he just mumbled something annoyed and left.

And these were only two examples, one time I thought I saw Miiko in the crowd of a concert, and another time, at the gym, there was a guy who looked incredibly like a human version of Jamon.

I was becoming completely crazy. I even thought about going to therapy, but what could I say? _I’m back from a magic parallel world and I can’t readjust to life on Earth_?

Yeah, sure.

Candy and I left the class idly chatting about thesis ad plans for the weekend. She was nice, I’d met her at the first personal development class I’d attended, but we didn’t have any other classes together, she was in the History of Art program. Still, we’d become good friends in the past few months.

“Ugh…” she said pointing towards a wall. “You know I love art, but this is too much.”

There was a huge mural freshly painted in the corridor. It wasn’t the first time this month, apparently there was someone sneaking into Anteros at night, painting these things on the wall, I could tell they were trying to denounce something, but the message wasn’t quite clear to me, strangely familiar but unclear. Still, the university had tried anything to capture this guy, but they’d never made any progress.

Candy left to meet her friends Rosa and Alexy, she asked me if I wanted to join but I wasn’t in the mood this time, I went to the library and spent a few hours trying to study.

I must have fallen asleep again on my books, because when I woke up, it was the middle of the night and the library was deserted.

I grabbed my stuff and quickly made my way towards the dorms. Before I could get into the building though, a strange noise caught my attention.

I turned the corner to find an unexpected sight. A guy, a tall guy dressed in black with a bandanna on his face and a hood covering his head, was painting a huge mural at the back of the dorms building.

It was… familiar. The painting was abstract, but its colours… I could see they were blue and white… and it reminded me so much about Eldarya and the Crystal… I had to look at it closer.

When I stepped towards it, the guy turned around and grabbed me by the arm, pushing me to the wall.

“Who the hell are you, and what do you want?” his hostile voice said.

But that voice… sounded too familiar. I looked up into his eyes, the only thing visible of his face and I almost felt like crying. Icy blue eyes… looking at me with a cold, aggressive stare I knew only too well.

“Lance…” I whispered.

Those eyes rounded in shock. “How do you know my n…”

And then I understood.

Those dreams hadn’t been dreams at all, they were his memories, somehow I was still connected to him.

He’d found a way to save everyone, Eldarya was gone but everyone was here on Earth, and the sacrifice for that were their… memories, their memories of each other and their life.

_This is going to take away from you everything you took away from her._

Before I could say anything else, we heard a guard coming our way and Lance ran, disappearing from my sight.

I ran too, towards the dorms, my mind and heart in turmoil, but it felt like I was finally breathing again.

Maybe this was what the Oracle had meant, saving Eldarya had nothing to do with the place but everything to do with its people, I was the only one with her memories intact, maybe my purpose was to awake them all and help them find themselves again. Help the faeries live in the world they’d originally escaped.

Prove that faeries and human could coexist.

It wasn’t going to be easy, but I could do it. I could save them all.

I could save _him_.

I smiled, finally relieved, _he_ was here, with me, in my world.

And I was going to get him back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end, hope you liked it.


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